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what left Behind The Anger

The emptiness is being a large hole in my heart.. What i could say now is just to little to late..  Its torturing me inside out..  But all i can do is just stay where i were..  I cant get any help from anyone..  Why i should be in this weekness? Should i stop thinking?  Should i just let it be..  How bout my heart?  Is it didnt deserve to be full with  happiness But now i realise ize that this life its not belong to me..  Its belong to my kids..  What happen if im gone?